Windows: Lots of beer, but it's flat; lots of food, but it's cold; and the fire alarm keeps going off so you have to go out and stand in the street, then go back in.
Mac: A catered party where waiters take care of your every need, but if you ask for unhealthy food they scold you and bring you a bran muffin.
Unix: There's no food or drink. But there's a great kitchen, and all the equipment you need for brewing beer in the bathroom.
VMS: A gigantic banquet, but the keynote speaker is so boring that everyone falls asleep and misses dinner.
MVS: A nineteenth-century dinner party - it lasts forever, has a million rules, and you spend more time dressing for it than you do eating.
Amiga: Only two people come, and they sit together all night exclaiming about how wonderful the food is.
NeXT: The invitations are so advanced that no one can find the party.
CP/M: Everyone sits on rocks and roasts bear meat they caught themselves over the fire
